Reading time: ~1 min · Tagged: motherhood, mental health
Where should I start? Hmm, it’s actually been a while since I last blogged. I used to write poetry in one of my previous blogs. And the other one was just me ranting about my young adult life. When I read my old posts, I felt embarrassed, and a little sad. I was so insecure back then.
I kept saying I didn’t care what other people thought. But actually, I did. I just never let it show.
Then she arrived, and everything shifted
Being a mom turned my life upside down. It’s not that I always feel good about myself or feel like I’m enough. Of course the negative feelings are still there, and there are moments that bring me down. Pre-mom era, I didn’t need to think about whether my choices affected anyone but me. I didn’t need to decide for anyone else. But that version of me feels like a different person now.
Being a mom taught me resilience. No matter how hard and unfair life gets, I have to get up. I have to be present. I have to keep going not just for me, but for her. And somewhere in that pressure, I found something I didn’t expect – I actually started to like who I was becoming.
The insecurity didn’t disappear. It just changed shape.
I was no longer questioning my worth as a person, but occasionally asking myself – Am I being a good mother? Yes, nobody is perfect. We’ve heard this many times. But of course we want to be the best version of ourselves. But in life, there are times when you are living, and times when you are barely surviving – that’s when bare minimum is good enough for you and the family.
Motherhood didn’t make me confident overnight. But it made me stop waiting for permission to be enough.
That version of me who needed everyone’s approval? She’s still in there somewhere. But she’s a lot quieter now.
Basically, Mom 
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